The first day of forever

When I saw them, boy and girl, neither older than 8 or 9, standing nervously on the corner, I felt a little catch in my heart and I almost started bawling.

Both were attired in an explosion of freshly laundered red, blue, yellow and green. They wore new sneakers, probably purchased weeks ago and carefully preserved for just this morning. Across their backs were slug spotless bookbags, filled no doubt with spiral notebooks, No. 2 pencils and packs of Sharpies and colored markers.

Today was the first day of school, you see, an event once so monumental in my household that it was prepared for weeks – yes, even months – in advance. An event chronicled with photos of scrubbed faces – occasionally marred with a smear of jam – bright with the prospects of new beginnings: meeting new friends and learning new things and taking another step on life’s broad highway.

It’s still an occasion of some note. My daughter, who’s still living at home, is a teacher, and she spent last week in teacher-training sessions and in setting up her classroom for today. Classes also officially begin today for my son, a sophomore at the University of North Texas in Denton, although he, already savvy in manipulating the system, managed to schedule all his classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

But the magic of what this day once represented to the Gunnels clan has faded. The treasured blend of pride and anguish my wife and I felt as our children toddled off to the bus stop (only one house away, so we could monitor them safely and secretly from behind a closed window blind) is gone forever.

It was sweet – oh, so sweet – while it lasted, but time, dammit, marches on. We must now be satisfied with tender memories of when we served on the front lines of parenthood, not in the rear echelon area to which we have been consigned by the growth of our kids into young woman and young man.

So I gave a little wave to the boy and girl (Brother and sister? Best friends? Next-door neighbors?) as I passed them. They ignored me, and with good reason, too. Their gazes were fiercely focused on the adventures ahead. The road to the future lay before them, a dizzying rollercoaster ride of heartache and exhilaration, battles fought and lost, battles fought and won.

Godspeed, children, I murmured. And safe travels.